Weekly Meander #8: Lincolnshire edition
Forgetting how to breathe, but remembering how to live
Hello! Thanks for joining me on a weekly meander through my week just gone – with a focus on my working life (a way for me to document a time of professional transition as well as a little shot of motivation and accountability to keep me pushing on!) And in case you're new here and wondering who on earth I am, do check out this post. TLDR: I'm a documentary filmmaker coming to the end of distributing my debut feature doc and currently exploring/expanding into new professional avenues whilst also navigating parenting & perimenopause. Some balls may be dropped!
I'm still quite new to Substack and really enjoying finding my way around so you'll also find my recommendations of great reads I've seen in the past week. If you enjoy it, do feel free to leave a comment. And of course I'd love it if you would consider subscribing to get all my posts delivered straight to your inbox.
This is the second of week of three that I’m looking after my niece & nephew while their parents are both overseas (more info in last week's meander here if you missed it) and I'm writing this from their house in Lincolnshire where I'll be for the next 11 days, swapping up my usual nursery & primary school drop off/pick up daily routine for a primary/secondary school combo instead (they have the same, fairly large, age gap of 6 years as my two kids, but are just a few years older).
But for most of this past week we were still down at my house in Brighton - making the most of the uninspiring blank white skies of solid cloud (unlike the bright blue sky & sunshine we've had up here today - which I do very much appreciate but which would have been even better when we were at the beach or on the pier!) We did get a fantastic double rainbow though so it wasn’t all bad!
I leaned in even harder this week to letting work take second place to life – something I can often find a bit challenging as a lifelong freelancer who's never received a day's paid holiday in her life. When there's no-one else to officially allocate certain days as DAYS OFF, it can be so tempting just to keep on working. But it's a temptation to be resisted I think.
In fact, as it turned out any temptation I might have felt was in any case offset by a run of terrible nights of broken sleep. And even worse, it was largely of my own doing...
With so much going on with the kids staying with us and doing lots of touristy stuff, as well as squeezing in work and other regular commitments like taking my youngest to nursery, I completely failed to notice that my preventer asthma inhaler (which I'm meant to use twice every day) was running low on doses - until it had run out entirely.
Then my doctor took longer than usual to approve my repeat prescription and the pharmacy I collect from for some reason wouldn't give it to me until the third consecutive day that I went in for it – confirming that they had it, but informing me that they couldn't give it to me because they still needed to 'process it'. By the time I actually got it, it was nigh on a week since the previous one had run out.
My night time breathing got progressively worse and sleep was more and more difficult to come by. We'd been planning a day trip to London as my little nephew was obsessed with wanting to see Big Ben. So by Wednesday I officially decided to give myself the rest of the week off.
We went to London. It was marvellous - we took the river bus to Milbank, went to Tate Britain, (the kids LOVED the green screen in the play studio – hot tip for any parents in easy reach of London), played in a playground in the shadow of the Houses of Parliament, took the number 26 bus to St Paul's Cathedral, walked over the wobbly Millennium Bridge, went to see the sublime El Anatsui installation at the Turbine Hall at Tate Modern and finished it all off with a cheeky Nandos.
And on Friday we watched Cbeebies, read books and relaxed. Perfect.
WORK WINS THIS WEEK
It's not been a particularly noteworthy working week for the reasons already outlined. I also heard that I did't get a place on the feature doc producers training I applied for. I never really expect to be successful with these things – the success I've had with both feature docs I've produced, one as director, one not, has come almost entirely without formal industry support.
All the same, it's still it's a downbeat feeling when you get the email: we received an incredible number of great applications, on this occasion you've not been successful, we appreciate your time in applying etc etc. But you sigh. And you move on. And you find (or make) the next opportunity. Speaking of which...
1. Sparkle on Substack reflection & goal setting members class
This was my first time in a live class with
having recently upgraded to become a paid member. It was, absolutely as I expected it would be, a wonderfully supportive environment and I learnt a lot (About page - I’m sorry I never noticed you there 😄).I haven't really had the time or headspace to follow through with a lot of the reflection and planning we talked about yet, but I'm hoping I may get some quiet moments up here in Lincolnshire to do that.
2. Booked travel & accommodation in Suffolk for a forthcoming screening
It's taken a lot of time and effort from various people but next month I will finally be taking The Atom: A Love Affair to Suffolk for a screening in the locale of the most likely site of the UK's next new nuclear reactor, at Sizewell C.
One of my contributors in the film, the former campaigns director of Greenpeace UK who went to battle against British Nuclear Fuels back in the 80s, lives in the area and this screening will be jointly hosted by Together Against Sizewell C – of which he is a co-ordinating member – and another local campaign group, Stop Sizewell C. It's happening at a local arts cinema so hopefully a broader cross section of the local community will come along too.
One person who definitely will be there is my aunt – recently retired and now enjoying her new life as a lady of leisure. She's going on a bit of a roadtrip around the East of England and one of the stop offs will be for this screening. So I've booked us both into a beautiful-looking historic country inn that does bed and breakfast, not too far away from the cinema. Getting to stay in some lovely places around the UK has definitely been one of the best aspects of distributing the film!
3. Arranged to meet a nuclear historian at the University of Lincoln
This is one of those great bits of happenstance – I recently found some articles by various academics on assorted nuclear topics that I'd printed out and then over-zealously filed away so that I simply forgot about them (do other people do this too?!)
And then I noticed that one of them was in Lincoln – very near to where I am now! So I dropped him a line. It turned out he was a fan of my film (yay!) and we're meeting for a coffee and chat at the start of next week. It's very pleasing when the universe drops you these little gifts. Especially when you've had insomnia for several nights in a row..!
WHAT I'M LOVING ON SUBSTACK THIS WEEK
Perhaps unsurprisingly, the title of this one leapt out to me as I'm currently away from my partner and children. This trip will be the longest I've ever been away from the kids (the longest before now was for 6 days in 2022 when I went straight from a long-planned weekend away with my two best uni friends to a a 4 day conference where I screened my film).
I miss them madly already of course. But what gentle solace & wisdom from
in the shape of a simple fridge magnet she inherited from her grandmother Valerie (I want to know more about Valerie!): How can I miss you if you won't go away? I really related to the whole piece and her admission of needing her work time away from her kids to feel truly herself. If you're a working mother of small children – and especially one who does creative work at home – maybe you will too.
As someone who recently made it onto a bus home with my daughter with an all-day saver ticket on my phone and the phone at 1% battery when the bus arrived, this piece truly spoke to me! Brilliant, funny story-telling from
1.
A thought-provoking read from film programmer and journalist
about what we might be at risk of losing if we carry on down the road of giant blockbuster film festivals franchising out across the world and potentially sucking all the oxygen away from existing local festivals that are genuinely rooted in the communities they serve.
Watch my film on Netflix (in Europe) or Vimeo (everywhere else) - or see trailer, reviews & bonus content HERE
Find me on X /Twitter & at LinkedIn
Life stories website – coming soon...
Of course, this sort of thing won't happen to me anymore since I got a shiny new battery from the Apple store. Right?
Thank you for the shout out Vicki much appreciated.
Thank you so much for reading and sharing, Vicki! I’m so glad you are all aboard with me in the low battery chaos! ❤️